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Monthly Archives: December 2009

An Avocado ...

is an Avocado ...

except ...

When an Avocado is Two Avocados .

Avocados aside, perspective is paramount to how we understand the world around us, it is for me in any event.

I was in the kitchen this morning, getting ready to make coffee and I looked up and saw the first avocado and thought, “I thought we had two avocados, that’s weird.” I got hung-up for a little moment on where the heck the other avocado went. It didn’t really matter, I just wanted to know. I continued to think about the avocado as I retrieved milk from the fridge and moved toward my waiting coffee. I continued to look at the avocado as I went and noticed that there were, in fact, still two avocados and that they had lined up in such a way, or rather, I had aligned myself in such a way as to be able to see only one of them.

The real significance of this, is that it is impressively easy to become caught up in my own point of view, or in one point of view and to be convinced that what I think I am seeing is the whole picture. This is true whether it is about organization and how much stuff I have (good, bad, or indifferent), what kind of progress I am making in  particular area, and just generally an important reminder about (my) ability to perceive my own part of the whole including where and how I fit in it. It is important to remember that I am not omniscient or all seeing and not just as a reminder of my own failings, but of my humanity. I can only do what I can do, work with what I am aware of and have faith it is is the right thing and move forward.

That’s it for now, other than to say that I needed A reminder of why I decided to write this blog, to out myself in a public way. I need and want to keep plugging along and doing what I can do, as that is, truly, all I can do. For now, this will be be more meta-cognitive and less active than it had been as I am, necessarily,  more more meta-cognitive and less active than I had been.

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Greetings and hello.

Long time no see, no write, no nothing.

I know, I know, It seems I’ve been a slacker. In truth my back blew out, to be precise, my L5,S1 disk. I was out of commission, entirely flat on may back, from Halloween night until well, I mostly still am, actually.

I had neuro-spinal surgery at UCSF on Friday, November 13, for what was an emergency condition, of I understand correctly. Turns out the back pain I had been experiencing for quite a while was not something I could just suck it up and get through, try as I might. My L-5 disk ran , like an estuary, into my spinal column and was pressing against the nerves leading to my left leg and foot and up my back. I am fortunate to have a fantastic Neurologist in town, Dr. Glusker.

In fact, let me back up and say, I have been very fortunate and blessed in the members of the medical community who have been looking after me since my move here among them are Dr. Tara Mcleer at the Mendocino Coast Medical Clinic; Dr. Eric Frazier, chiropractor extrordinaire ; Dr. Peter Glusker, Neurologist, have all been so important in the parts they have played in keeping this whole thing from being a complete night mare. I am so blissfully lucky that my disk didn’t rupture, that I am predominantly free of pain and that I seem to have a pretty good chance of having my left leg and foot come entirely back to life. Thank you very much, all you and all of the support staff involved.

I suppose you don’t need a play by play of all the down and dirty details, but suffice it to say that for once in my life, I had a serious medical condition that was taken seriously. It was acknowledged, diagnosed, and dealt with with rapidity and skill. Dr. Glusker examined me and then sent me for an MRI (surreal art that capture the body’s inner working, and I must here thank the fantastic MRI tech for her good work as well as the radiologist who read them at Mendocino Coast Hospital -thank you).The MRI confirmed and possibly even expanded on his suspicions which led to a diagnoses. He referred to me to USCF, to the top neuro-spinal surgeon in the state for goodness sakes, Dr. Philip R. Weinstein.

I am having such resistance to writing/doing the blog again, but feel I must jump in again where I can, so instead of coninuing with this post, trying to get it right, I am simply going to post it.

I am including below, well below, pictures of the progression of my incision healing. There was an internal stick poking out, which was hampering healing. I think that is a nice sort of allegory to what happens with my house, myself, and hoarding. There is an internal bit poking out and getting in the way of progress, surgery and healing aside. I am searching for that protruding stich, so I can deal with it.

Space inserted in case you don’t want to see incision pictures

Space inserted in case you don’t want to see incision pictures

Space inserted in case you don’t want to see incision pictures

Space inserted in case you don’t want to see incision pictures

Space inserted in case you don’t want to see incision pictures

Space inserted in case you don’t want to see incision pictures

Space inserted in case you don’t want to see incision pictures

Space inserted in case you don’t want to see incision pictures

Progression of healing from 3 weeks after surgery